Poem about the pain of imprisonment.
I remember it so clear it was 2003
Sometime in July as hot as can be
Rolling with my so called pal in my car
Driving locally so we were not too far
Picked up his chick in crazy moschino
Little did I know she gave him a kilo
CID watching in the blue range rover
Then they aggressively pulled us over
My mate didn't tell me shit he just ran
By then I knew we were heading to the can
Judge Darrell smith, he gave me 5 years
Like 2pac I shed so many tears
I was innocent, got locked up for that shit
But my faith was strong that i didn't quit
11 months away from family & friends
Sometimes I thought this was the end
But then my appeal came through,
It was a real dam hard fight
Had the correct lawyer to clear this right
Came back & I started my life again,
The moral of this true story is to
Watch yourself, watch your friends...
A story of strength in the face of trauma.
People often judge me as someone who has always had it together.
But that’s SO far from the truth...
So I want to share my backstory with you…
My journey began in 1986 when I was born in Sheffield, England. Then at six-years-old, I moved to Canada with my mom.
My mom got married and life was good until my step-dad started being an abusive monster to us both.
So when I was 12, mom sent me back to live with my biological father in England to escape the awful abuse I was experiencing.
I was emotionally damaged from my experience in Canada and was diagnosed with severe depression and put on Prozac at 12 (I know right)
Living with my father was fine until he was a victim of a horrific attack and was stabbed 17 times 😥
He died on the operating table twice, but pulled through and survived. However, he developed complications from the attack and wasn’t able to look after me anymore.
So from 13 onwards, I drifted between living with friends, children’ homes, carers and hostels.
It was a really painful and lonely time. I struggled to make sense of any of it😢
My whole life experience until then was nothing but pain, loss and trauma.
I still get emotional when I think about it.
I dropped out of school at 14 and never took my G.C.S.E’s.
My grief eventually turned into anger and destructive behaviour.
I became disillusioned with life and began going to nightclubs, having sex, drinking, smoking, taking drugs...you name it.
One day I met a guy called Joshua who was like a Godsend at the time.
Joshua was tall, good looking, older, had his own house and made me feel special.
Joshua became my boyfriend and asked me to move in with him, then within a few months, I fell pregnant.
When I learned I was expecting a baby at 15 I was scared, but happy at the time because I finally felt a sense of belonging and connection that I so desperately wanted.
What I didn’t know was that Joshua had a violent history.
Throughout the pregnancy, Joshua became violent and controlling towards me.
He didn’t allow me to go places without him and got violent when he became angry.
The last and most serious incident was 2 weeks after I had given birth. Late at night he ambushed me and dragged me into a field where I was brutally beaten and left for dead.
I was left with severe swelling on my brain, a broken jaw, eye socket and broken ribs. I almost died from the injuries and had to stay in hospital in case I slipped into a coma.
Thankfully I survived that ordeal, but developed PTSD and could not leave my house for months after the incident.
Then six months later I was called by the police who informed me Joshua had murdered his new girlfriend.
When I heard the news, I felt shocked and sick inside. My immediate thought was that it should have been me.
By this time, my mind, emotions and spirit were completely broken. I’d been through so much mental, physical and emotional pain my emotions completely shut down.
I became emotionally numb and later developed a serious alcohol and drug addiction.
It was when I turned 17 I met my very first mentor who helped me discover that I could change my life and become whoever I wanted to be.
At this point, I had never even considered I could have a better life.
Up until then, I believed my life was meaningless and worthless.
I believed I had no purpose and that I would amount to nothing.
I believed nothing good could ever happen to me.
But when my mentor spoke to me he for some reason made me believe things could change and no one had convinced me of that before.
It took that one person to open up my mind to new possibilities.
He taught me you COULD create whatever life you wanted, but there are three things YOU MUST DO
✅ Be clear on what you want
✅ Believe it’s possible
✅ Start working on it RIGHT AWAY
Since I learned those three principles I DID JUST THAT!
Within the following two years, I got myself clean, got my first job, started my first online business, got married and moved into my dream house.
My life was never the same since!
What I learned is that sometimes it takes just ONE person to change the trajectory of your life.
❤️ One word.
❤️ One act of kindness.
❤️ One person to believe in you.
This is why I’m so passionate about teaching, coaching and mentoring others because I truly understand the life-changing impact it can have on you.
We all have the potential to WIN no matter where we’re starting.
We just need the right people guiding and supporting us on the new journey.
So for those of you who judge me, or believe I had a great upbringing, a stellar educational background, or always had it figured... Nope, not me!
I’m the broken teenager who turned a very bad situation into a beautiful one.
And if I can do it through the circumstances I faced, it's possible you can too!
Remember..you are the author of your story and it’s not about how your story starts, but how it ends! ❤️
A poem about how life Can change in an instant
It only takes one punch, one shot, one knife to take one life
There was this man from the estate running late, he was running for the bus when he accidentally bumped into this boy and his mate, the boys got mad and what is sad is that one drew a knife and took the mans life
It only takes one punch, one shot, one knife to take one life. Now there’s a grieving mother who screams at the skies above her and on her knees at the grave she claws at the earth for the boy who she gave her life to after his birth. She’s heart broken to the core and not sure if she can go on anymore
It only takes one punch, one shot, one knife to take one life. Now there’s a grieving father who lays awake at night wishing he tried harder, his guilt is out of control and now he has no soul. He wants to take his sons place and be his saving grace
It only takes one punch, one shot, one knife to take one life. Now there’s a grieving daughter who’s supposed to be getting wed but can’t even face getting out of bed, the best day of her life has gone from good to bad because walking her to the altar was supposed to be her dad
It only takes one punch, one shot, one knife to take one life. Now there’s a grieving sibling, a brother who always thought he could protect his mother and his whole family but now he’s lost in the depths of insanity, he’s constantly on the brink and reaching for that next drink.
It only takes one punch, one shot, one knife to take one life. Now there’s a grieving sister who feels like she’s caught up in a twister because now she is missing her big brother who would always pick up the phone and listen, she’s struggling to see this now her reality
It only takes one punch, one shot, one knife to take one life, but it isn’t just one life that’s taken it’s a whole family that is now trying to cope with its hearts breaking.
A story of strength after trauma .
‘My Partner Stabbed Me, Now I Tackle Violence Against Women'
As part of The Voice's ongoing series celebrating our women, we hear from Tanya Pinnock, frontline practitioner working with vulnerable girls and young women
SURVIVOR: Tanya Pinnock
TANYA PINNOCK has spent years tackling the issue of violence and against women and girls, specialising in working with vulnerable young women.
Currently, Tanya is a frontline practitioner working with vulnerable girls and young women at risk of sexual exploitation. She has numerous years experience of working in the field.
She is a passionate and dedicated advocate of domestic abuse awareness, with extensive insight into the latest research.
Tanya has a passion for mentoring women and girls who have experienced domestic abuse or are at risk. She has delivered training throughout the UK to a wide range of professionals, including doctors and social workers, aimed at enhancing the services and intervention offered to victims.
Her informative workshops on helping abused women began in secondary schools, eventually becoming recognised by professionals for her dedication.
They have since requested to be delivered to a wider audience and diverse array of professionals.
My motivation developed… as a result of experiencing domestic violence for over seven years, subsequently, leading to me being stabbed repeatedly by a former partner.
A career highlight was… successfully completing a BA Education Studies Degree – I achieved a 2:1.
I also contributed to the strategy to combat violence against women and girls, speaking at numerous events addressing domestic violence and gender equality.
I am passionate about the experiences of African and Caribbean young people who have been affected by domestic violence. This is an area of interest because my personal experience identified it as one that has been is under-researched.
I am inspired by… the resilience and strength of women and girls who achieve despite adversities in their lives.
My role model is… Oprah Winfrey.
The best part of my job is… being able to have positive interactions with young people that will empower them into making informed choices.
In my spare time I… enjoy cooking. In fact, I am currently in the process of launching my own catering business.
I would tell my younger self to… believe in your capabilities and never doubt that you are capable of achieving your goals and aspirations.